Some people listen to white noise in headphones to boost their focus & creative juices. Isn’t it ironic? Where true focus and spontaneous creativity comes from is stillness and indeed if we sit down & slow down enough what we notice is that there is white noise in our ears already.
To clash with an ego as an ego deploy the trigger points of the ’’other’’ ego to attack ’’your’’ own ego. Never defend yourself. Fight fire with fire, kind of. If someone is struggling with some form of inferiority complex (and passive aggressively demand respect and attention) tell them—nonchalant and unflinching but not provocatively—something to the effect that your insides are made of jello and deep down you are nothing but a needy little bitch and you are sorry to let them down like that. In other words, know their Kryptonite and instead of rubbing it in for them rub it in for yourself. Never defend. Simply attack yourself with their ammunition. And see what happens. And remember: ’’They’’ are attacking ’’you’’ because they are defending themselves. ’’They’’ are attacking ’’you’’ because they are afraid. They are in emotional pain.
All interpersonal glitch stems from the sense of separation. The resolution to this glitch is simply to cease to exist [as a separate self] or as Adyashanti likes to put it: I’ll be free (from ’you’) when you get to be free from ’me.’ In other words, the only place we can truly meet is right in the middle or rather ’in front of’ us where: I don’t need ’you’ to stay with ’me’—I’m not grasping/needy and I don’t need ’you’ to leave ’me’ (be)—I’m not recoiling/avoidant.
On the personal level am stuck in a loop of constantly trying and falling short. My ego operates according to the logic of STRUGGLE which siphons off all my energy and literally dries up & cannibalizes my body. That’s all that it knows: ’I’ enacts struggle in order to STRUGGLE. This is the loop I has been caught up in and that has [set up] ruined relationships and compromised my metabolic health over the years. Unfortunately (or fortunately) to my body my ego writes checks it can no longer cash. My petite body just cannot sustain the intensity of the massive STRUGGLE it is supposed to manifest. And so there is a lag, a hotbed of symptoms. That’s the main reason why I am forced to give in, to come out of hiding from the truth. For which I’m grateful even if at times it’s painful.
The truth of the matter is: The less I hide the less I am and the less I am the less I STRUGGLE.
Most people want to remain separate and ‘in control’. Most people want to keep dreaming that they are special, unique and separate. They want to remain separate more than they want to wake up to the perfect unity of an Unknown. (Adyashanti)
I have a rule: If you wish to be seen, show your truest colors—the other stuff: that sticky, clingy, gooey, needy, personal, phony, affected, demanding, ambivalent, avoidant, shadow-play way of relating, no thanks, please. But then, this is a rule I myself am struggling to live up to. For all intents and purposes.