The Truth Has Nothing To Do With You

Take nothing at face value. See through the sur-face. See through the ripples. Rest with the truth of this moment. No matter the content it’s the context of your engagements that manifests in your experience. No matter their content it’s the context of your comments that determines the interpersonal trajectories involving you.

 

See through the bitchiness of women, see through the antagonism of colleagues, see through the heavy moods of loved ones, see through their trans-generational, trauma-induced compulsions to hurt and feel hurt, see through the ingratiating comments of your fans, see through your adverse and elated reactions—feel them, embrace them, fully, rest in them, struggle with ease—nothing’s a big deal.

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good partners co-evolve

in relationships it’s vital to find partners
who match and more or less mesh with your pace & style of growth

in a way, everyone plays an essential role in your life,
each person you encounter draws out & helps you discover (or recover) another facet of your Self

in effect, mismatches are inevitable and indispensable for driving this very process of self-(re)discovery

but it is absolute key that you don’t overstay and don’t let others either overstay their welcome
for every relation solidifies the Self into an IMAGE for its other
which propels growth only till a tipping point of diminishing returns

in short:

the IMAGE you co-create with your partner in your relationship will sooner or later stifle you (two) out of a generative dynamics into a degenerative one if the mismatch in your styles spirals too wide between the two of you and you cannot transcend (and include) that IMAGE of yourSelves in another (upgraded) version of it as the relation evolves & progresses

it takes communication
listening, self-awareness and common sense

TRYST

friend or foe: pick your choice

apparently there is no middle-ground
for people with low self-reliance

woe is me: I got cornered by a needy person
demanding me dance with their strings attached

ok,
in the corner
here is what I came up with:

trust & respect is the currency
that sustains social transactions

trust is the fuel the propels social dynamics
(breach of trust renders it dysfunctional)

trust pivots on transparency

once I let guilt get triggered in me
and snap out of poise
I cave in to the pressure to appease & seek approval
and by the same token
I jeopardize trust & respect

the backbone of the relationship collapses and it degenerates into something mushy and vague

the interactions become contrived

and here is the deal:

letting yourself be bullied into seeking approval and giving up your resolve is something you should resent yourself more for than others

once you find yourself in this predicament there is only one way FORWARD: you have to address the issue head-on and communicate it openly with the parties involved
with this you’ll probably incur even more resentment
but at least transparency gets restored and the relationship is “saved” from blurring into the murk of dumb antagonism

success is failure

you achieve your results
in spite of your efforts

your body knows what to do
and it does it
provided you give it space

to give space takes time

by merely being present
you feel compulsions arise

your duty is to show up for your impulses
and take ownership of them

results come not from effort
results come from relaxation

what high performers and athletes achieve is success not results
results come of alignment

when I wake up & do corrective stretches
it is not something I force myself to do
I am merely slow enough for my body to compel me to do so

hunger and taste is a better dietician than nutritionsits

[industries are in the business of attenuating intuition]

results come not from effort
results come from relaxation

and relaxation doesn’t mean indulgence in distractions
which is based on avoidance
eating & watching junk
sitting around in a masturbatory loop of idleness

relaxation means presence
showing up, taking ownership
which is based on allowing

once you manage to methodically relax and sync up with your compulsions
you start achieving (your) results

be smart

stop pretending that you don’t get stuff
that you don’t understand his/her motives
that wit & quips are forever lost on you

it’s easy to play possum
it’s easy to tone it down

in as much you are an embodiment of nature
even if a particular human projection of it,
you have access to it “all”
and all it takes is “just” relaxing into it

to be into it is to intuit 😉

true,
we are way less than we think we are
but also, infinitely more
than we could ever imagine