Translucence

I see myself as a human (at)tuner of sorts. I tap into higher frequencies of presence and I expose others to these frequencies through the way I engage with them. I intend to tune others into these subtler frequencies within, to be more present themselves and feel loved and loving as a consequence. Tuning takes time and it takes trust. The stronger the existential momentum one happens to be caught up in the longer it takes to come to a sufficient standstill where true intent arises to orient subsequent actions. It takes time, trust and patience, but the rest takes care of itself. I am there basically to help make room for the deceleration to occur.

Here is a list of some of the (intertwined) practices that I [as an introvert] typically do to cultivate inhabiting subtler frequencies of energy:

  • social isolation and minimized distraction (no TV, no news, using the internet and social media once a day for an hour @ the local library)
  • sufficient recovery after ’social exertions’ (taking a nap, resting)
  • writing (journaling, composing blog posts and bon mots to share online later)
  • standing and sitting still (as a way of active meditation)
  • walking
  • humming & singing to myself
  • stretching, foam-rolling, rippling and rotating my limbs and my hips in a spiral and wave like fashion, all movement directed from my core, swinging a clubbell occasionally
  • listening to monotonous music (Basinski) or a track on an endless loop (e.g. Earth is Gone by Slugabed)
  • listening to speeches by Adyashanti, David Deida, Owen Cook
  • eating a relatively clean & balanced diet (Ray Peat inspired)
  • engaging others mindfully and as authentically ’’as it gets’’ @ work, the shop, the café, social events, etc.
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Allow

Feel your fear, heed the bitter, sour sounds of your fear, listen to its rumbling voice, follow it to its deepest reaching root, where it actually stems from, ferret out the seed of it and let it shoot into the story, the stalk, your character role, see the unfolding plot, the whole picture of it, spot the projected belief and sniff at the foul fragrance, the strong stench it emits, let it bloom full and drop its petals, one by one, all of those pale blue petals, and then, let it wither, on the spot, and rot.

Captain Plan B

One type of planning involves an image in the mind that you are fixating on and that causes anxiety and stress. The other type is the one that is basically a knowledge of what’s already unfolding (through you). The best plan is the one where you feel called to relax more and more efficiently into the self-assembling scheme of the plan itself. In other words there is a sense that all the steps that need to be taken and all the tasks that need attending arise organically, and you don’t exert more force than necessary. Instead, you are as economical with exerting force as it gets since you recognize that there is no need for control and nothing has to be held together and so there is no rush, no hurry, no stress, no worry—all is required is that you direct your attention to the issue at hand and truncate the tendrils of fixation cropping up. Figuratively speaking: You hold your hand open as a cup rather than grasp after what you fancy or at what falls into it. Execution requires no clenching or sustained focus and fixation. Again, all that is required is attention. Discern the distinction! To attend [rather than fixate] means that you never need to do or come up with anything at all so long as you simply direct your attention to what you intend, no matter how long it takes, the best idea, the best insight, the best action comes of its own accord if you rest your attention there long enough. All of life comes basically down to this one thing: to your patterns of attending.

Dilation

Take the leap and take the lead. Stay nonstick, pure surface—congruent and accountable to nothing and nobody but the truth and only the truth. No longer abdicate the truth for anybody’s sake. Argue no longer with the truth. Argue no longer for the truth. Keep it sweet and simple. Be the truth. Be nobody—pure surface. You need nobody—stay nonstick. All you have is the truth of this moment. Take the lead. Let the truth orient you. Nobody can harm you. Nobody can pin you down and guilt or shame you into feeling accountable for anything any more than they can do it to the truth. The truth is infinite—fickle on its lush surface but immutable at its empty core. It’s you—pure loving. The truth finds you when you stop (running from it). Respond to every instance of engagement with opening. Open through [self-inflicted] emotional pain. Open through hurt. Open through fear. Open for the sake of opening. Follow your fear. Follow the trace of love’s blood. Follow the path of the heart through the jungle of fear. Respond with opening. Nothing can harm you. All there is is this moment. Everything. Whereever and whoever it happens to find you with right now—this moment is where you truly belong. Respond with opening.

Baby Steps

Stop and stand still. See through the slapstick surface and engage on the level of raw energy. Relish the ever subtler nuances. Open your eyes. Open your jaws. Open your face. Open your neck. Open your shoulders. Open your chest. Open your stomach. Open your gut. Open your crotch. Open your ass. Open your legs—and follow the lead of the impulse that rises from the ground up through your heart and through your limbs.

See—this spontaneous movement, the movement welling through the heart is not oriented backwards—caught up melancholizing about bygone times and lost loved ones—nor forwards—seeking success, preparing for a breakthrough—but aroundwards, fully in & outwards, nowhere near but right here, now.

UFC 101

What switches ’’me’’ on is what shuts my heart down. The ultimate fighting challenge is the one between my heart and my ego. To show up with flying colors—sans the personal dolor.

Critical

Get familiar with your internal instrument board, map out and start tweaking the equalizer of your psychology. Once they are discernible move the needles a bit toward the lighter, brighter spectra. From the lower, denser vibrations to the higher, fickle vibrations of energy: From being serious toward being curious; from your formulaic opinions toward attention; from clean-cut answers toward inquiry; from the loaded questions toward more openended ones; from certainty toward confusion; from the neurotic toward the erotic; and so on. The path to Clarity leads from the seemingly clear-cut through the infinitely vague.